Family Mediation UK - Video
This video is produced by the Ministry of Justice in the UK . It highlights the benefits of using mediation for family cases.
Eliminating “Hot Speech” in Marriage
Anger is not a good thing. It’s not a good way to solve problems. By taking a timeout, you can become calm. You are no longer in “real” time. Emotions abate.
Why Couples Are Choosing Mediation in Divorce Cases
If you are contemplating a divorce or having trouble settling divorce issues with your spouse, mediation might be the best choice. Mediation is a great setting for you and your spouse to settle your divorce issues in a more amicable fashion with less stress on you and other family members, including your children. Being able to settle issues quickly helps children and other family members adjust to the situation as well.
Divorcing Parents: Avoid Bringing Your Battles to Court
You're getting divorced and you're angry, resentful, hurt, vindictive or any combination of other painful emotions. Hiring the most aggressive litigious divorce lawyer you can find seems like your smartest choice. If you're a divorcing parent who is thinking along those lines, you're making a choice you may long regret.
Globalization of Family Mediation Rooted in Children’s Rights
Mediation now includes standards and guidelines for international family mediation. Unlike traditional family mediation rooted in state family law codes, international family mediation has developed within the context of international rights of children. The Hague Conference on Private International Law (HccH) used the principles found in the United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child (UNCRC) in framing international family mediation. The first standards for cross border family mediators was presented in December 2012.
Dealing with Your Ex’s New Other
For many, some sort of relationship with your ex exists beyond divorce. Whether you have children, business interests, or other things in common after divorce, you may have to confront a new love interest in your ex’s life. Below are five tips to help you interact with the new other and maintain your personal integrity.
Love, Eros, and Negotiation
Even linking the notions of love with negotiation rubs some people the wrong way. Love, after all, should be pure and not subject to vicissitudes of business. And, negotiation, being business, many believe should never be personal. In most relationships, however, personal and business, love and negotiation are inseparable and he denial of that reality frequently and unnecessarily contribute to the end of many relationships.
The "Too Attractive" Bias
On Sunday, October 13, 2013, I will be participating in a panel presentation entitled, "Ethical Duties of Eliminating Bias in the Legal Profession" as part of the California State Bar's Eighty Sixth Annual Meeting in San Jose, California. The focus of our discussion will be hidden/implicit biases- those biases that exist within us, subconsciously, if not unconsciously. When do these actually become discrimination?
A Rose by Any Other Name
Most of the leading law school textbooks explain arbitration by describing a case where a party suffers a loss and there is a dispute between the insurance company and the insured. The insured typically places a high value on the subject of the loss, while the insurance company places a lower value.
Co Parenting Strategies
There are 5 strategies that both parents should employ while parenting. These strategies help parents to maintain sanity and keep consistency for their children.
Virtually Everyone is Touched in Some Way By Divorce
Understand that although your marriage is ending, you have every right to hold on to the memories of the good times and of the good years. They were good, and nothing can take that away. It is not that parts of you are being torn away or destroyed, but rather the divorce experience, and the self-knowledge you gain, will help to define and develop the whole person you are becoming.
As Marriage Equality Disputes Arise, so Does Opportunity for ADR
Recently the United States Supreme Court issued long anticipated rulings in the first marriage cases to reach the high court – United States v. Windsor and Hollingsworth v. Perry. Taken together, the decisions represent a significant step in the central civil rights issue of this era – the rights and responsibilities of same-sex couples to marry.
Mediation in Cases of International Family Conflict and Child Abduction
The School of Law, National University of Ireland, Galway hosted in association the UNESCO Child and Family Research Centre, NUIG and the Irish Centre for International Family Mediation a Conference on Mediation in Cases of International Family Conflict and Child Abduction on a typically damp Saturday in May in the West of Ireland.
3 Fallacies over Lunch
At lunch today, a very good friend and I started talking about Collaborative Law. I have known him over 30 years and we often talk about law, divorce (he's had two) and what I do as a lawyer. We have discussed Collaborative Law a number of times. I learned today that I need to be a little clearer with others when I talk about how the process works. I was shocked to hear statement after statement of misunderstandings from him.
Infidelity and Family Mediation
Spouses fear infidelity, and for good reason. They see other marriages dissolve as a result of it. Infidelity seems to always have the effect of a fire – uncontrollable and unpredictable. It often destroys a marriage. But does it have to?
I Didn't Leave the Children
From a mediator's perspective, slowing down, taking care to name truly, and to value messiness, are key elements of our practice. To break the cycle of attack/defend ("You left us/I didn't leave the children") is only possible by creating a space wide enough to encompass the complexity of where they currently stand. These perspectives are gathered from 16 mediators in a recent advanced family mediation training.
5 Tips for Co-Parenting After Divorce
Divorce affects the whole family. It causes parents to worry about children in ways they never thought they would. As the relationship between a couple change from souse to ex, so does the parenting relationship.
From Behind the Glass: Mandatory Family Law Mediation
This article sets out a plan of attack for how an attorney can effectively advocate for their client in a mandatory family law mediation setting where the attorney is excluded from the mediation session.
10 Helpful Tips for Mediating Child Related Issues
The article provides helpful tips and considerations for parents to address in divorce mediation when minor children are involved. There are specific considerations that parents need to be made aware of before they enter the mediation process with children.
The Gray Divorce
Though the fact that divorce has become more common and less of a stigma has some impact, that does not explain why the gray divorce rate is climbing while the general divorce rate is going down. Denise Tamir suggests a few contributing factors.
Mediation Case Law Video: Enforcing Oral Mediation Settlement Agreement
In the case Ledbetter v Ledbetter,
the appellate court considered the issue of whether parties to a divorce mediation should be bound to a settlement orally dictated by the mediator and affirmed by parties and their counsel at mediation, which was later repudiated by one of the parties.
New Perspective on Domestic Violence and Mediation in Montana
The original Montana provisions for family court mediation, enacted in 1993, attempted to shield abuse survivors from attending mediation with their abusers. This reflected a national focus on the issue at the time. Section 40-4-301 of the Montana Code Annotated allowed courts to require any parties to participate in family law mediation. However, it made an exception for domestic violence.
Preparing for Mediation: A Practical Guide to Mediator Selection
Greg Stone's latest book Preparing for Mediation: A Practical Guide provides straight-forward tips for mediators. This excerpt from his book discusses considerations for selecting mediators. It also suggests ways for mediators to allow their clients to save face while making progress in the mediation.
Is Collaborative Law Worth the Cost?
For people facing divorce, a common question is whether Collaborative cases are "cheaper than litigation". While there is no way to compare a specific Collaborative case to an abstract idea of a litigated case, we can say that Collaborative Law will avoid a lot of the expense involved in litigation.
I'm Heading for Divorce. How do I Start?
This article walks through the divorce process for someone who is just beginning to consider a divorce. It gives a practical guide for people to navigate through the process without an emotional roller coaster.
On Spin Cycle
Here we go; round and round. That’s the sound of the all-too-familiar family whirlpool in which one person (usually the woman) asks that a chore get done and the other person (usually a man) seems agreeable but never quite gets it done. She starts tip-toeing around the subject, he avoids it, she gets louder, he acts like she’s a nag, and now they’re on spin cycle with no forward progress in sight.
Five Tips to Let Go and Forgive after a Break-Up
Learning how to let go and forgive helped me a lot after two “break-ups.” Neither of these was with a spouse or romantic partner, but they were deep and difficult and painful nonetheless.
Informative Mediation -- A New Model for Tough Economic Times (Part 2)
Not everyone distrusts or has reason to distrust his or her spouse in a divorce. Not everyone needs an advocate to actively and adversarially negotiate, but instead can use the attorney in his or her corner for advice, for information and for document reviews. Not everyone needs to pay for a two-attorney collaborative process. How can a divorce attorney best serve this market? The answer may be the process of "Informative Mediation," described in this two-part article.
The Dangers of Badmouthing Your Ex To The Kids
Getting a divorce is tough on any couple, but it’s even tougher on the kids. Think about them when you’re tempted to bad mouth your ex. The outcome may be very different from the one you planned.
Four Keys to Successfully Mediating Temporary Orders in a Divorce Case
This article offers tips from a practicing divorce attorney on how to
effectively mediate temporary orders terms in a divorce case. Scott Morgan offers
his thoughts on how to prepare the case for mediation, necessary
preparation of the client for mediation, how to negotiate terms
intelligently, and the proper mindset the attorney should have.
How to Start a Collaborative Divorce
Since Collaborative Law is still relatively new, many people may feel unsure about how to start the process. It's actually very simple.
Ten Commandments of Divorce
This article is an excerpt from the book, Ten Commandments of Divorce. This article encourages people going through a divorce to take the time to move slowly, act with respect, and create a safe space for their children.
25 Prenuptual Questions
Ken Cloke suggests 25 prenuptual questions that are helpful for couples mediation. These questions are designed more to facilitate a strong marriage than a smooth divorce.
On Weathering Marriage Communication Style Differences
Marriages can successfully weather significant communication style differences. It helps to set the foundation for success early, but if that boat’s already sailed, fear not — you can still change its direction.
Reducing Stress Through Divorce Mediation
This article discusses the ways in which mediation can help to reduce the stress that couples undergoing divorce may experience. By creating a cooperative atmosphere, reducing the time that divorce proceedings take, and lessening the financial burden of a divorce, mediated divorce may be the perfect solution for couples looking to amicably end their marriage.
Tips for Better Communication During a Divorce
In any divorce, things get heated occasionally (or more often). In Collaborative divorces, the parties can still feel considerable stress. It is an emotional experience. Sometimes, parties will react emotionally, in anger, and that is regrettable. Here are some quick tips to help maintain a constructive relationship between the parties.
Family Business Conflict: Flexible Solutions
In a family business conflict, relationships are embedded in a system of family dynamics and a business system. It is impossible to separate the two components: familial relationships and business relationships. One informs the other in a circular fashion. This article discusses the correct mediation approach to working with the two systems.
What Is Mediation – Revisited
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Within the field of family and divorce mediation, there exist two different types of mediations and two different types of processes which depend upon the needs and desires of the parties. Any given couple could at one point desire and need "structural divorce mediation" and at another point desire and need "impasse divorce mediation." The processes are not interchangeable. They serve different needs within the same field, although there is undoubtedly some overlap between the two.